dreamsallotted | Hadriel IC Inbox

[Seel started hammering. That was not what he wanted to hear. He wanted a nice, simple answer. The kind that Swift gave him. The 'yes, of course I still love you but I'm pissed off as hell and you need to be a nicer har. What is wrong with you?' He liked those. This involved more self reflection than he wanted to do. Seel was self aware enough to know that he didn't like what lay beneath the surface. It was easier to just fool yourself into thinking you were wise and self aware.]

Figures, you'd say something like that.

I'm not going to do your work for you.

Figures you'd say that.

What happened to you anyway? You changed.

[He paused hammering, and stopped talking more a minute..]

I'm thinking of talking to someone. That human doctor on the network.

"What happened" to me? You know exactly what that was. [Or part of it anyway.]

Why?

I don't know everything. It's not like I was there.

Because I miss Swift and I was murdered, Cal. What other reasons do I need? They're mine.

[touchy touchy]

You can take an educated guess, I'm certain.

Fine. Sorry I asked.

[Seel threw down the hammer, easily frustrated.]

Is it always going to be this way?

What way?

Like I'm not sure how to talk to you anymore.

You'll have to figure that out yourself. I'm not the one having a problem.

I had a dream a few weeks ago, you know. During, well, I'm not sure what that was.

And? Are you planning on sharing?

I think I inadvertently did. That human doctor and Jo.

Inception. I should have told you sooner.

[Since it wasn't like Cal hadn't been a part of the dream. At least, Seel's memory of him.]

That was a long time ago, Seel.

Yes it was. Was that even us?

It used to be. Not anymore.

Somedays I'm not so sure.

[A pause]

How could you stay with them Cal? I've always wondered.

Feeling nostalgic?

[He sighs.]

They wanted me, Seel. I could be what I was without complaint, without worry. They took us in when humanity gave us up. I owed them.

[Seel was feeling quite nostalgic actually. Until Cal opened his mouth and Seel realized again just how angry he was.]

You owed them? After what they did to us, you owed them?

I can't believe I'm hearing this.

Yes, Seel, I did. And you wouldn't be where you are now without them, either.

[Seel was silent as that hit a little too close to home. He wouldn't be. What happened to him was the reason he started Saltrock. Everything snowballed from that event.Shit. He hated that. Fuck.]

Just because that's true doesn't make it okay.

They were monsters, Seel. I don't deny that. But that's where I belonged. For a long time. I needed them and so did you. Maybe we don't anymore but that doesn't change that at some point we did.

I hate that. It's been fifty years and I still hate it. How can you be so calm?

I learned to love the beast until I didn't need it anymore.

[There were so many things in that one sentence Seel almost didn't know where to begin. He fought against that damn thing every moment and still had trouble containing his temper. And Cal just.....let it go.]

I'm not even sure I know how to respond to that, Cal.

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